friday hello
Just an audio dedication to those of my friends whom I've not seen in awhile.
(Yes, this is a pretty terrible, one-off recording.)
Happy Friday.
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my (hitherto imaginary) future wife wish list
Today, I decided to make up a little list of qualities I think my ideal compatible mate would have.
Now I've gone and made it public. I'm sure if I ever do settle down, I'll fall in love with someone who's nothing like most of these. This is totally going to come back to haunt me.
Essentials:
- Serves Jesus of Nazareth
- Dedicated to being part of a congregation wherever she lives.
- Does not consider divorce an option.
- Trusts and respects me.
Would be Nice:
- Accepts (good)/Appreciates (better)/Shares (great!) my obsession with foreign languages.
- Would be interested in living abroad for extended periods of time.
- Holds libertarian political values.
- Thinks reading is fun.
- Her idea of a great date is staying home, renting a movie, and snuggling on the couch. (movie optional)
- Could let me pamper her for a day without feeling guilty in the slightest.
- Could pamper me for a day without feeling used in the slightest.
- Loves to receive and give back rubs.
- Knows the difference between good cartoons and poor ones.
- Tends to see the best in everything and everyone.
- Takes genuine compliments as they are intended.
- Sometimes/frequently leaves the house without wearing makeup.
- Thinks being 5 - 10 minutes late for most events is normal.
- Would be bored after 30 minutes of shopping for clothes.
- Thinks living without Cable TV is a good idea.
- She is a great personal communicator.
- Never uses their when she means they're or your when she means you're.
Just Icing on the Cake:
- Thinks making unsolicited sandwiches for her future husband would be fun.
- Her first reaction to the words "family vacation" is to wonder which tent we should bring.
- She likes karaoke.
- Enjoys good-natured ribbing (i.e. thinks insult wars are funny).
- Holds the following pet hierarchy: Large Dogs, Ferrets, Cats, Sea Urchins, Small Dogs.
- Thinks waking up at 6am voluntarily would be ludicrous.
- Does not find the making of a future wife wish list to be insane and/or creepy at all.
How to create an Insurgent
Anyone remember these scenes from The Patriot? (A warning for the faint of stomach, such as myself: this is pretty graphic.)
I remember watching this movie for the first time, and it was pretty disturbing.
One might say that I simply have a weak stomach or that I'm unable to deal with reality. To the contrary, I believe there's an extent to which the reality of war should disturb us. Something is fundamentally wrong when one human is responsible for the death of another. If I am in a car accident in which another driver is killed -- even if I'm not responsible -- I don't shrug it off as bad luck; it's a life-changing event. If someone is sentenced to death, it is usually because they have caused the death of another. Killing (voluntary or involuntary) is an action that we have no power to reverse. We take it seriously.
This reality does not disappear in war. Combatants do not enter into lethal engagements lightly. If they do, it is viewed as particularly heinous, even among soldiers.
So what does any of this have to do with insurgency?
Motivations
Mel Gibson's character, Benjamin Martin, is hesitant to become involved in any conflict with the British at the beginning of the film. He has seen his share of violence in the French and Indian War. He knows how brutal things can be, and has himself committed atrocities. He does not want to expose his seven children to that kind of existence. Nothing the British have done in terms of disrespect, oppression, or even violence elsewhere in the Colonies is enough to rouse him. Neither freedom nor liberty are sufficient to inspire him. One single issue drives his hatred and willingness to die fighting, and that is the indiscriminate killing of his civilian son. From that point on, he becomes a member of the armed resistance. In modern terms, he would certainly be categorized as an insurgent.
Of course, we know that The Patriot is a fictional story loosely very loosely situated in historical context. What is not fictional, however, is the psychology behind Martin's reaction. We humans will endure significant abuse and oppression before involving ourselves in armed resistance against a government force. No one wants to become a target, and we'll usually try to evoke change via means that don't get us shot.
All of that changes if you start killing our children. If that line is crossed, all bets are off.
Nearly a decade has passed since the September 11 attacks of 2001, during which time much has been made of an existential threat posed to our nation by Islamic extremists. According to Bush 43, our resultant war on terror will not stop until "every terrorist group of global reach has been found, stopped, and defeated." Furthermore, he claims terrorists "hate us" because we have a "democratically-elected government", and because we have "freedom of speech." Assuming it were possible to defeat every terrorist cell around the world, the argument is that we could commence with being free and secure once again.
This understanding of terrorist motivations has been accepted and repeated by our mainstream media outlets. It has been the party (both parties?) line ever since. Nearly a decade later, we remain in Afghanistan (to say nothing of our other entanglements) with no apparent intent to leave. It would appear that we have been incapable of achieving our stated goals thus far, and do not expect to achieve them in the near or foreseeable future.
Michael Scheuer, former head of the CIA's Osama bin Laden unit, has an alternate understanding of why terrorists are willing to attack the United States. He argues that the reason we're attacked is not because we're free or because of cultural issues, but rather due to our policies in the middle east. He bases that belief on Al Qaeda's explicit claims: "Vote for whoever you want: Bush or Kerry or the devil himself. This does not concern us. Our concern is to purify our countries from aggressors and to stand up to whoever attacks us."
Perspectives
Of course, there will always be anomalies like bin Laden or Zawahiri who are willing to fight for regime change. They are displeased with the oppressive leadership of Saudi Arabia, and with Israel's policies in Palestine. These governments (and others) would lose significant influence without the United States, and he's willing to fight to degrade that influence. However, your average Afghan resident has no direct interest in these issues. Many of these people have never even heard of the 9/11 attacks. They are doing well to feed themselves.
So why would they get involved with a group like Al Quaeda? -- for the same exact reason as our fictional Benjamin Martin: because their loved ones are dying.
A few days ago, 9 Afghan children were killed in an operation when they were misidentified as insurgents. As disillusioned as I am, I have a hard time believing that NATO troops would intentionally kill children in reprisal to an attack. Regardless, this is by no means an isolated incident. In fact, Gen. Stanley McChrystal made the following comments about our early involvement in Afghanistan:
"We've shot an amazing number of people and killed a number and, to my knowledge, none has proven to have been a real threat to the force... [none of the cases in which] we have engaged in an escalation of force incident and hurt someone has it turned out that the vehicle had a suicide bomb or weapons in it."
With that kind of admission from a General, it's not hard to see why the likes of bin Laden would find recruiting much easier. Consider this reaction by Mohammed Bismil, adult brother of two of the young boys who were killed last week: "The only option I have is to pick up a Kalashnikov, RPG or a suicide vest to fight." Another quote comes from a relative of injured civilians in a May 2010 attack: "If the military keeps doing this, the people will go into the mountains to fight them. When I saw my daughter injured, all I could think about was putting on a suicide jacket." (see video below at the 36:50 mark for the interview)
Conclusions
I recall my sense of queasiness being mingled with some level of satisfaction as I watched Mel Gibson unleash his holy wrath on a platoon of British soldiers with the expertise and stealth of a ninja. (It was like seeing the Punisher and Batman rolled into one.) His son had just been killed needlessly. He had a right to revenge. He had a mission to save his oldest son. He was achieving an honorable goal and making aggressors pay.
Of course that is an easy position for me to take. I'm an American white man; I can identify with this guy on a cultural level. I would be devastated if a child or a brother were murdered by an outside military force. I could almost see myself taking that kind of retribution, given the chance. It should be easy to understand the motivations of someone who has seen their loved ones killed by foreign forces, someone who has not been inundated with messages about the evils of the Taliban and Al Quaeda. We may see the man with an RPG or suicide jacket as an insurgent -- a terrorist -- but he sees himself protecting the family he has left and pursuing a righteous vengeance. Perhaps it would behoove us to consider how impossible it would be to see things any differently in those shoes, and to direct our policies accordingly.
One thing is clear: if we continue to kill civilians, we also deliver fiercely-dedicated recruits to Al Quaeda and its allies. Our long list of failures in this regard leaves no doubt that our declared enemy has grown stronger and that we have become less secure as a direct result of our presence in Afghanistan.
on being unstuck
My family moved around pretty often when I was growing up, due to my father's career as a Marine. People ask whether it's hard to be uprooted every three years or so, but it really wasn't difficult for me. For all the comforts you stand to lose in leaving, you also stand to be loosed from some discomforts.
For instance, as a middle-schooler, I had a pretty sour disposition and very few friends. When I moved to a new city as a freshman, I decided I would be a totally different person. I remember clearly the conversation I had with myself before the doors opened my first day: "Lloyd, it doesn't have to be like it was at your old school. No one knows you, and as far as they're concerned, you might be the coolest guy here. Take down those walls you've built up and make some friends." I didn't turn out to be the coolest guy in school, but my social station improved greatly. Whatever people thought of you before, whether good or bad, you can change it all in a new place.
I bring this up because yesterday in my Bible reading, I felt led to look at Ezekiel 33. Ezekiel is told to relay a message for God. I'd like to quote it here because no summary I have composed does justice to the import of this passage:
Therefore, son of man, say to your people:
"If someone who is righteous disobeys, that person's former righteousness will count for nothing. And if someone who is wicked repents, that person's former wickedness will not bring condemnation. The righteous person who sins will not be allowed to live even though they were formerly righteous.
If I tell a righteous person that they will surely live, but then they trust in their righteousness and do evil, none of the righteous things that person has done will be remembered; they will die for the evil they have done.
And if I say to a wicked person, 'You will surely die,' but they then turn away from their sin and do what is just and right -- if they give back what they took in pledge for a loan, return what they have stolen, follow the decrees that give life, and do no evil -- that person will surely live; they will not die. None of the sins that person has committed will be remembered against them. They have done what is just and right; they will surely live.
Yet your people say, 'The way of the Lord is not just.' But it is their way that is not just. If a righteous person turns from their righteousness and does evil, they will die for it. And if a wicked person turns away from their wickedness and does what is just and right, they will live by doing so. Yet you Israelites say, 'The way of the Lord is not just.' But I will judge each of you according to your own ways."
It's shocking to me how accommodating God is here. What I mean by that is, God gives us the freedom to change our mind about what kind of person we want to be.
We humans have a tendency to assign one another (and ourselves) permanent labels based on our past. Inertia is a physical concept, but we import it frequently into the spiritual realm. If I lied to someone yesterday, they might assume I am that much more likely to lie again today. Conversely, if I've been making good choices for the last ten years, people may assume I'm nigh insusceptible to do anything different.
It's funny how often a godly life is seen as a set of chains to restrict us from doing what we like, and yet God's very choice to allow us free will also pegs Him as unfair. How can He immediately accept someone's choice to change for the better when they've been making bad decisions for years? Do all those things count for nothing? Conversely, how can He condemn someone who begins to make bad decisions when they've been doing well all their lives? Do not all those years count for anything?
The problem, I think, is with our skewed perspective. We only see these policies of God's in light of how they affect us in the moment. If God allows me to have a second chance, to change and do better in the future, then He's great. If He allows that same freedom to someone who wounded me deeply, He is unjust. Conversely, if God forces those who commit to Him never to change their mind, never to have the freedom to walk away, He has created soulless automatons. If He allows someone who has stayed on the path their entire life the freedom to turn off at the last minute and waste all those years, He is heartless.
In our twisted way of thinking, God cannot win.
Returning to our tendency to assign these permanent labels, let me confess that I've been completely guilty of that way of thinking, myself. I've assumed people who have wounded me in the past would continue to do so, and so put up my walls to refuse them the opportunity. The cruel end of that path, by the way, is even more pain. It often results in the loss of what might have been wonderful if we'd not made such stalwart assumptions.
Perhaps even more cruel is when I affix these permanent labels to myself. We all know the voice inside who whispers that we can never escape who we are or who we once have been. We choose to agree with this voice, and descend ever further into our own demise.
It's comforting to know that the voice with whom we've so frequently agreed is lying. What we once were -- even what we are -- is not binding. Rather, we have the freedom (and every reason) to choose better.
It's been a long time since middle school, and I'm thankful most of you never knew me then. Being stuck with that personality would be pretty unpleasant. Whatever laurels I may now possess, I want to resist the temptation to rest on them. The same voice that would bind me to pits in my past would just as soon blind me to those in my present.
Lord, teach me to walk right beside You, following where You lead. Only in submitting to You do I escape the chains behind and the pitfalls ahead.
29 Goals
It occurs to me that in five days, I will turn 29. I've been looking forward to 29 for awhile now; I have a weird obsession with prime numbers, and I always feel like it's going to be a great year when my age is prime. In honor of that, (and also the fact that this will be the last year of my 20s), I've set 29 personal goals I'd like to achieve before the big 3-0.
These are just presented in the order I wrote them down:
- Read the Bible all the way through.
- Translate one of the shorter books of the New Testament from Greek.
- Get my weight down to 175lbs.
- Run a 7:30 mile.
- Bench my own weight.
- Have at least one immediate neighbor visit my apartment.
- Visit Japan.
- Take the GRE.
- Read twelve books.
- Host a single day LOTR movie marathon.
- Write a short story.
- Write a song.
- Take a road trip somewhere west of Texas.
- Play at an open mic night.
- Cook a legitimate three course meal for someone(s).
- Ride the city bus for at least an hour.
- Complete a two-day solo hike.
- Wake up to see the sun rise once a month.
- Take care of/keep from killing a plant for at least three months.
- See the Grand Canyon.
- Spend a night sleeping on my porch.
- Convince someone to walk around with me in the pouring rain.
- See a big college football or NFL game.
- Pay off my credit card (and thereby be debt-free).
- Perform fifty consecutive push-ups.
- Sing karaoke solo.
- Have lunch with a professor from my alma mater.
- Enter a ping pong tournament.
- Learn all the words to "Ice Ice Baby".
So that's it, folks. If you've got any better suggestions and think one of mine should be replaced, you'd better get it in before Tuesday. : )
